Shouting and hitting is the easiest and most recognised form of discipline by humans, however not by horses. Horses are very sensitive to the body language of those around them. A very talented trainer could control, discipline and reward a horse by body language alone.

By imitating how horses communicate together, you can send very clean message to a horse. Used with judgement, skill and timing, discipline is a form of communication that the horse understands and an aid to learning which will increase the level of respect shown to you by your horse.

Say ‘No’ in a firm (not loud) voice.

Bring the horse under control (usually by stopping him) and make him stand quietly. When you are ready, carry on with what you were doing.

Put a light pressure on the horse’s head collar and ask ‘down’. Lowering the head is a submissive gesture, and it also helps the horse calm down.

Put a hand on the horse’s chest and ask ‘back’. Not only is it unpleasant for the horse to move backward, it’s also another submissive gesture.

Move right into the horse’s space and then ask the horse to move out of your space, by asking ‘back’ or ‘over’. This is another submissive gesture.

Raise and/or stomp your foot. This is a threat to kick.

Watch for a positive reaction from your horse. This could be a submissive act or an attempt to follow your directions.

Stop immediately. Calm yourself down. Soften your body language and voice, and invite the horse back into your space.

Repeat this every time the horse performs the same act. Be consistent.

Horses form strong emotional attachments to their herd members. If removed from the herd, even to be placed with another herd, many can become anxious and distressed. People who keep horses traditionally call a horse who has this kind of reaction “herd bound.” Some horses, instead of becoming attached to a herd in general, form very strong bonds with one specific horse. This feeling of attachment may or may not be shared by the other horse. Unfortunately, a horse who has a strong attachment to another horse will often have extreme reactions when separated from that individual. Horse people sometimes call a horse who becomes upset when separated from a specific companion “buddy sour.”

How a horse is separated from other horses she’s bonded with can affect the way she responds. Some horses are only distressed when left alone while another horse is led or ridden away from them, but they’re not distressed if they’re the one being led or ridden away. The location of the separation can also determine the way a horse reacts. One horse might only become distressed when left alone in the barn but not outside in the pasture, while another might be less upset when she’s left in her stall than when she’s left alone outdoors.

Alternating pasture mates may also help horses overcome strong attachments to particular horses. This strategy can also prevent problem attachments from forming.

It’s important that you don’t expect your horse to be able to walk all the way to the stable—or even out of the pasture—just because you have treats with you. Her herd may be more important to her than food. Because of this, if you know that your horse starts to object when she gets to the pasture gate, begin your treatment there. If you know that she doesn’t even like to be led away from the herd, begin your treatment by simply attaching the lead, turning her head toward the gate and giving her treats. Don’t wait to give her the treats until she won’t lead or is calling to her buddies.

Put a lead on your horse while she’s in the pasture and walk her toward the gate. As soon as she’s out of sight of her buddies—even if it’s simply that her back is to them—give her treats, such as carrots, apples or grain. Wait a couple of minutes while she eats. Then, while she’s still calm, return her to the herd. Some horses may not be willing to lose sight of their herd, even for a moment. If this is the case with your horse, begin by leading her around where the other horses are grazing. Turn her in a small circle so you can feed her treats while she’s not looking at the other horses. Next time, make the circle bigger.

Gradually increase the distance you take your horse away from her herd. Your goal may be to get her to the stable, but you will need to start small. The gate will likely be a trouble point, so lead her up to the gate and treat her there. Then walk back to the herd, let her graze a minute or two, and, when you are sure she’s calm, start again. When you get to the gate this time, open it. If your horse starts bobbing her head or trying to see the other horses, make her wait at the gate and move through it yourself. Then, instead of bringing her through the gate, turn and face her on an angle (never stand directly in front of an agitated horse), and feed her treats while she’s turned away from the herd but still in the pasture. After your horse eats the treats, lead her back to the herd and let her graze again. Next time, take her through the gate.

Practice your separation exercises twice a day, once in the morning and again in the evening. With this schedule, your training sessions will be close to feeding times. When you can get your horse to go into the stable, you can feed her a meal and she’ll get an extra reward when removed from the herd.

If you choose to provide animal companionship for your horse, be aware that 1) the companion shouldn’t be left in the stable with your horse until the two animals have been supervised through two or three feedings so you’re reasonably sure that your horse won’t injure her companion, and 2) you must take time to introduce the new companion to your horse, particularly if the new companion is a different species. To introduce your horse to a new friend, pasture them adjacent to each another or walk them next to each another for a few days until neither shows fear or distrust around the other.

Unfortunately, companions aren’t always feasible for horses, and some horses react aggressively to other species. For these horses, another solution is to provide mirrors in their stables. Choose a mirror that is large enough for your horse to see her own reflection (approximately 4½ by 3 feet). Make sure the mirror is acrylic and made specifically for horses.  Mount the mirror so your horse can see into it at a natural, relaxed head height—about 1½ feet above the ground. Avoid hanging the mirror near the feed manger to prevent your horse from competing with her own reflection for food.

Products avaliable to treat separation distress

Herbal remedies are commercially available and usually include ingredients such as St. John’s wort, valerian root, chamomile flowers and Bach flowers. They are sold in swab, spray, liquid, powder and capsule form.Pheromones

Pheromones are chemicals made inside an animal that trigger natural responses in other members of the same species. Most people are aware that animals can give off chemical scent signals to indicate when they’re ready to breed, but animals also use pheromones to send alarm signals, greeting signals and “I was here” signals. Scientists have found that some horse pheromones are calming to other horses. Equine Appeasing Pheromone is a commercially available synthetic pheromone based on a natural pheromone secreted from specialized glands. This pheromone is dispensed as a mist that you can spray directly into your horse’s nostrils to help calm her when she’s in new, exciting or stressful situations. If you choose to try this kind of pheromone, first make sure that your horse won’t react fearfully to you spraying her face and nostrils.Medication

A veterinarian may prescribe a medication for an anxious horse, but there are no medications specifically labeled for horses experiencing separation distress.

Take a moment to picture this ideal experience with your horse: He responds to your leg cues energetically, yet calmly as you ride along on the road or bridlewayt. Just the two of you, out enjoying nature and each other’s company. He sighs gently as you move passed the big boulder and cross the river below. You see a rabbit just ahead in the distance and you are delighted to watch it hop out of hiding. Wildlife is no longer an issue for you and your horse. You have gone through a process of sensory training to desensitive your horse to these all these obstacles. Horses have a memory like a steel trap – once learned that obstacles will not harm them – they never forget. Your hard work has really paid off.

It is important to remember that horses are, by nature, prey animals and their primary defense against predators is to quickly detect any sign of danger and flee from it. Consequently, your horse quite naturally perceives anything new and different as a possible threat. Through a few simple steps, you can gently expose him to unfamiliar objects and experiences in a way that will allow him to overcome his fears and eventually feel more curious than afraid when presented something new. This will make every new experience a positive one for you both.

• Begin introducing objects to him, starting with the very familier (ie.: brushes, hoofpicks) and working progressively to more and more challenging objects. In the end, you will be using such monsters as helium balloons, umbrellas and shopping bags filled with empty cans.

• As your horse accepts these items on the ground, set up an obstacle course in an enclosed area and begin by riding at a walk, past obstacles, beginning with familiar and working up to playing a radio, flags, crossing tarps, large cardboard boxes, blow up toys – the possibilites are endless.

• Allow your horse the freedom to retreat if he chooses to do so. To develop true trust in you, your horse needs to have the choice to either stay and investigate that which you offer or to leave of his own free choice. The ideal would be that you expose him to new things so gradually and patiently that he has the time and space to show you acceptance without the need to retreat.

• Listen to yourself and your horse. Only through careful observation will you know when the two of you are ready to move on to the next level of challenge.

Remember that the learning process is one of repetition and creativity, and even with the study of famous trainers, you may need to reach deep inside yourself for the perserverance necessary to help your horse overcome his natural fears.

What constitutes a vice?
A vice is a bad habit or negative activity that can happen as a result of stress, boredom, anxiety, fear, or excess energy. Stereotypical vices can easily be copied by other horses within the barn and become habits that are extremely difficult to break. Horses that are kept confined in their stalls for extended periods of time may resort to vices.

Types of vices:

Kicking: Stabled horses may resort to kicking due to boredom or hunger. Horses that learn to kick can quickly learn to destroy doors and other parts of your stable. Unfortunately this is also a vice that is easily taught to other horses. Ways to curb or decrease kicking behavior are to add another mealtime, place toys in the stall, or allow the horses extra time outdoors.

Weaving: Generally can be attributed to boredom but can also be a learned behavior. A horse that exhibits weaving behavior will shift its weight from side to side, moving from one front leg to the other and swaying his head and neck. Weaving can lead to weight loss, weakened tendons, and poor performance. Horses that are turned out to pasture will generally stop weaving.
 

Box walking: Horse will continuously walk around his stable in circles due to boredom. This can cause damage to ligaments, joints as well as simply wear your horse out. To decrease this behavior offer more turnout time. If your horse must be in a stall, offer toys or try adding an additional mealtime.

Wood chewing: This behavior is often based on a psychological rather than nutritional issue – usually lack of exercise or boredom. However, proper attention should be paid to ensuring a balanced and adequate diet is adhered to. Wood chewing can cause abnormal wear on teeth which in turn can cause issues with grazing. Provision of a salt block is recommended as is covering all wooden surfaces.

Cribbing: Often caused by boredom, horses will set their incisors into a horizontal object, arch their neck and pull backwards, swallowing air. This causes a release of endorphins and can be very addictive. Cribbing can lead to weight loss, gastric colic, and excessive tooth wear. Spray deterrents such as Chew Stop can be used on surfaces your horse uses to crib as well as coverings for wooden surfaces.

Tail rubbing: Often associated with parasites – horses will back up to anything and rub. Once your horse has had a bout with parasites the rubbing can become a habit. Can result in damage to skin and tail. Parasite control is essential to eliminate possible issues.

This is not a complete list by any means, but it is designed to give you an idea of some of the more stereotypical vices that horses employ when they are continuously stalled.

The key to help avoid these vices are as follows:

• Turn horses out more often to allow for more freedom and less boredom.
• Give your horse toys to keep his mind and body active.
• Offer companions like roosters, goats, or cats.
• Increase their roughage or hay content.

When tending to your horse consider that they are designed to spend their time outdoors grazing. With that in mind, try to adjust their care accordingly, and you’ll have a pleasant companion for years to come.

Although every horse owner knows when to contact the vet, farrier or dentist, most haven’t considered what to do when the problem isn’t physical.

As part of everyday horse care, it is routine to look after your horse’s health and ensure his feet, teeth and back are in the best condition possible. However, although it is easy to measure physical attributes, many owners overlook psychological health. Having a happy horse is vitally important as it can benefit his confidence, mood and performance, as well as helping him to get more enjoyment out of everyday activities such as hacking and schooling.

The human effect

Although juggling work and looking after a horse can sometimes mean constantly rushing around, it is important to remember that horses can feel our energy levels as well as just responding to words and body language. Equine behaviourist Sophie Ostler stresses that horses are prey animals. “If horses sense we are hurrying them or getting impatient they pick up on this as a rushed energy, which translates to the ‘flight mode’. It is important to remain calm, as they look to us, the ‘heard leader’, for reassurance”.

Body language is key

To assess you horse’s happiness it is often useful to look at his body language during everyday handling – this can be a very good indicator of what he is feeling. “From a behavioural point of view, an unhappy horse will typically display certain signs,” says Sophie. Separation anxiety when leaving his field mates, a reluctance to stand still, or staring into the distance with head held high and a tense jaw are all elements to look out for. “When a horse is in this state it is important he is allowed to keep moving until his attention shifts to the handler,” Sophie points out. “If the horse is ‘made’ to stand still during this mental state he can feel trapped and it can activate his ‘flight’ mode, making his behaviour worsen”.

We are all part of a herd

Although a horse’s ‘unhappy’ behaviour may seem obvious, there are also many happiness indicators, too. A happy horse sees his owner as part of his heard, ideally the ‘heard leader’, and licking and chewing are signs of a horse submitting to your leadership. Other signs include being responsive and calm, a lowered head, soft eyes and relaxed jaw. A contented horse will seek affection from his owner and show respect by not invading their personal space. “Yawning is also a good sign,” says Sophie. “It doesn’t necessarily indicate a bored horse, but is a sign of relaxation. When horses are stressed or in ‘flight mode’ it is physically impossible for them to yawn due to their increased heart and respiratory rate.”

What can you do?

It is important to spend time with your horse to build up a bond of trust and respect. Groundwork is invaluable for this, and will have a positive effect of all areas of handling and ridden work. Sophie suggests introducing your horse to new things can help him build confidence and improve your relationship. “Horses are naturally inquisitive about everything, so this can be used to your advantage. The more positive you make new experiences, the more trusting your horse will become, and the braver he will be when entering new or unfamiliar situations.”

You are the boss

Spending more time with your horse on the ground will be invaluable to your relationship, but it is important to remember that you are the boss. An overconfident horse may try and take the role of ‘heard leader’ by displaying bolshy behaviour and trying to dominate his owner into submission – a situation which will be bad for both of you. Remain calm but assertive when working with your horse from the ground, and remember to use your voice and body language to remind your horse if his behaviour is unacceptable. However, “being the boss should not be confused with rough handling,” Sophie warns. “This does not make for a safe or happy horse and will just make his bad behaviour worse”.

How to have a happy horse

To have a happy horse, it is vital to be aware of what is important from their point of view. When something is bothering your horse, think of ways you might be able to help. For example, if he is agitated, remember that a threatened horse will want to run, so don’t insist he stands still. Allowing him to walk around will help him settle. Having a secure and happy horse will benefit his behaviour, mood and performance in the school. However, most importantly, it will benefit your relationship and improve your trust, bond and confidence in each other.

Health

Nowadays a month can’t go by without national news shows sharing studies about the devastating effects of stress on the body. Stress breaks down the immune system, leads to obesity, causes sleeplessness, can provoke hair loss and much, much more. Although stress is a natural human and horse reaction to negative stimuli, it is not a natural or healthy state to remain in! It is essential that you provide an easy-going, calm and happy lifestyle and atmosphere for your horse in order to ensure positive health and longevity.

But It’s A Stressful World!

Yes, it often is, but your horse doesn’t need to know that. As long as a horse’s basic needs (food, grazing, productive exercise and companionship) are met, he will live a relatively stress-free life. Sometimes it can be difficult for us to avoid stress, but a properly cared for horse really has little to no reason to experience life’s anxieties.

Customer service personnel are often told to “check their attitude at the door,” and while such advice is fairly blunt and candid, it’s 100% true. Just as no customer service representative has a right to mouth off at a customer because they are having a bad day, no horse owner has a right to lash out verbally, emotionally or physically at their horse to make their horse as miserable as they are. Horse owners, like CS representatives, must learn to suppress their stress and negative feelings so that they can provide suitable care and respect to their charges.

If you cannot provide for a horse’s basic needs, you shouldn’t own a horse until you can. If you cannot suppress your negative emotions, try not to work with your equine partner until you’re a bit more relaxed. Ultimately there is little reason for a horse to live in a stressed state.

How Do I Know If My Horse Is Relaxed?

This may seem like a flippant answer, but if your horse is relaxed he will look and act in a relaxed manner; it’s really that simple. Here are some questions you can ask yourself when gauging a horse’s comfort level:

Does my horse enjoy my presence, or would he rather evade me or find companionship with the herd?

When I pet my horse does he tighten his muscles and brace himself, or does he loosen up even further?

When I lead my horse, do I have to tug on my line to get him to move, or does he gladly walk by my side?

Does my horse seem to enjoy his riding or exercise sessions, or does he begrudgingly follow instructions?

Does my horse pass a lot of gas or manure (particularly the loose variety) when working with me?

Horses really aren’t that different from us when it comes to dealing with stressful situations. When we anticipate something dreadful we tend to tighten up, hold our breath or assess the area to scope out potential routes of escape. When we’re not happy we sometimes slump our shoulders and appear downcast rather than alert and perky. When we’re unhappy or stressed we have a hard time focusing on the goal at hand since our mind wanders constantly to that that distresses us.

Although the verbal queues such as vocal tones aren’t available with horses, the above physical cues do indeed exist. Watching your horse’s body language and mental clarity will go a far way to assess his state of mind and take the appropriate corrective actions to lessen the stress in your horse’s life. Remember, relaxation is the key to your horse’s health, attention span and ease of learning during lessons.

Quiet, insensitive horses are generally very forgiving of rider error but sensitive horses are not. The training your horse received before you purchased him may have driven him crazy and made him what is commonly referred to as hot. Thoroughbreds purchased from the track are often nervous because they were required to fit into the mould expected of a racehorse with little regard for the learning capacity of that particular individual. Similarly, almost any breed is susceptible to becoming hot or nervous if they don’t fully understand what is required and have been pushed too quickly without a methodical approach to training.

It is very important for the rider to have a relaxed yet poised position, the ability to use each body part independently and be constantly aware of how their aids and reactions are affecting their horse. While this sounds simple, it takes thousands of hours and experiencing many different horses and situations to achieve. The reality of the fact is that many riders must make work and family their priority and understandably can’t devote eight plus hours a day to perfect their riding.

Reality faced, it is still possible to help your horse improve whether your goals are successful competitions or fun trail rides. Make sure your horse has ample turn out time with lots of grass or hay and minimal amounts of grain. Horses that are cooped up and fed lots of grain simply have too much energy and want to release it by running and playing, so make sure your horse has as much turn out as possible!

Lungeing your horse can make him quieter to ride but learn to do it well so you progress your partnership rather than simply letting him burn energy. A round pen is wonderful, but again, you must understand your positioning and posture to really reap the benefits. Do not expect to bring your horse along at the same speed as a professional. Because your aids and timing will not be 100% perfect, you must allow your horse time to figure out exactly what you are asking. Repetition is key, but when you achieve the reaction you want twice in a row, move on to a different exercise. You’re training sessions should be short but frequent, and always repeat exercises taught previously.

Every horse at the start of his training must be able to walk, trot and canter on a loose contact. By this I mean a short rein with no contact with the mouth, keeping your hands forward and your arms relaxed. This allows you to have a loose rein yet the ability to use the reins with little effort for steering and downward transitions. It is difficult to get hot horses to relax and master this vital part of basic training. If your horse is so worried that he can’t stand still with you on his back, let him eat grass with you mounted. Initially, have a ground person with a lead rope so he can’t take advantage of the very long rein and run away. Your horse needs to realize that life is not full of stress when you ride. After he can stand still and hang out in a relaxed manner progress to walk and trot with countless transitions in between, until the horse ‘waits’ for you. At this stage all you are looking for is relaxation and rhythm, brilliance can come later. Always use the lightest aid possible to get your horse to move forward. Most hot horses relax if the rider whispers the cue to go forward. Your horse must accept contact from your leg, but will rarely need a strong driving leg or spurs.

Make sure you use a mild bit. My favorite is the Myler Combination bit assuming that you can find someone who can explain how to fit and use it. If you want a more traditional type bit go with the Myler Comfort snaffle or a french link, neither will pinch his tongue like a single jointed snaffle. Bits with a low port as seen in many Myler bits and also Kimberwicks can be a good choice. These bits work more on the bars of the horses mouth than the tongue and are sometimes readily accepted. Don’t be afraid to experiment to find the bit your horse is most comfortable in. If he doesn’t like it he will be even more tense and high headed than usual. Hot horses simply have not learned to yield to the pressure of the bit and not understanding why the pressure is there they get worried and stronger, riders then apply more pressure because they have trouble stopping them and the cycle continues. Force will make matters worse, your horse must understand the bit to respond correctly to it. Rein-Aid elastic inserts can help him ‘get it’. The combination of elastic and leather backing interact to instantly reward the horse when he softens to the bit. The consistent release of pressure when the horse softens gives him confidence in the bit making him more relaxed and trusting.

I also like to teach the horse to back up, remember that at the beginning of each backwards step he takes you must soften the rein to reinforce the ‘you give, I give’ concept. If your horse does not know how to back up, use a high fence or barrier to start. Apply rein pressure and as soon as he even thinks of going back release the pressure.
Reapply the aid with consistent releases for each step and soon your horse will understand. Your objective is to teach the horse that a relaxed yield to the bit makes the pressure go away. When you can walk, trot, halt and back up quietly you are ready to repeat the same lessons including the canter with the emphasis on relaxation and no pulling. Keep the canter sessions short and circle with a downward transition if he starts getting hot or worried. Patience and time will bring results. Once you can master this relaxed, loose rein work in a quiet environment then it’s time to introduce your horse to trails, shipping to other rings/quiet environments, rails/low jumps and increasing his understanding of the aids, suppleness and connection.

Sadly, months of great consistent work can be ruined in one day if your horse becomes scared and looses his trust in your judgment, so increase your demands and exposure to new things in tiny increments. All disciplines have proven methods for teaching horses the specific things required for your chosen discipline. Read books, watch videos and get help from someone knowledgeable so you ensure that your horse remains relaxed and fun to ride. Ride trained horses if that’s at all possible and constantly work on your own relaxation and a correct position that flows in harmony with your horse. Take the slow approach, nobody EVER ruined a horse by going slowly with his training. Enjoy the process, because we are privileged to be able to ride and become partners with these wonderful animals.

Kim Keppick is a certified BHSII instructor who has trained hundreds of young horses that went on to be successful show hunters, jumpers, dressage or event horses including the famous USCTA Horse of the Century, Biko. An ‘A’ pony club graduate from Ireland and long listed for their 1988 Olympic 3-day event team she now specializes in developing partnerships with adult amateurs and their horses. Her students include riders of all levels with their own horses, many who are winners at A rated shows, Preliminary eventing and Third level dressage.

1) To place confidence in, rely
2) To commit to the care of another with assurance

The accomplishment of confidence is complete when two individuals develop confidence in each other in all circumstances. This state of existence is known as trust. Trust between you and your equine occurs when you believe that your animal is acting in your best interest, and your animal believes that you are acting in their best interest. Such occurrences are rare, but do exist.

Mutual trust must be developed over time by building positive experiences together in various situations. To place your trust in an animal that you are unfamiliar with is foolish. Building the bond of trust with an animal that you know takes time.

All aspects of a proper relationship are perfected through time. The foundation, or starting point, is gained through understanding. As the hierarchy goes, next is the development of communication, then the establishment of confidence, then mutual respect, and final step in building a relationship is completed when mutual trust has been achieved.

Trust is developed through time by building confidence in situation after situation. This obviously requires spending time with your equine. No living being on earth remains the same, but rather is in a state of constant change. Your equine knows this as surely as he knows that the social order of his own herd is not constant, but rather is a never ending struggle for dominance. Time spent away from your equine diminishes the level of trust, and thus requires more positive experiences together to reestablish your relationship.

To establish trust in your animal you must be willing to surrender your doubts, fears, and negative thoughts. This is not done foolishly, but with careful consideration of what your relationship is currently with your equine and what you want that relationship to become. As stated in the definitions of trust in the beginning of this article, you must learn to rely on your animal and to commit yourself to the care of your equine. For trust to be mutual, you must teach your animal to do the same for you. This does not come easily or quickly, but it is achievable. If your equine fails you, it is up to you to show forgiveness and to work harder at developing all aspects of your relationship with him. If you fail your animal, it is mistake, but can be corrected. Amazingly, when we do fail our animals they are always quick to forgive us even when it is not deserved. We are responsible for the situation our equine is in. We are responsible for our own environment and circumstances surrounding our existence, and that of our animals, not vice versa. When a person knowingly violates the trust that their equine has placed in them, that person has demonstrated a total disregard for true horsemanship. To be worthy of your equine’s trust, you must have concern for its thoughts, feelings, needs, health, and well being.

If you compete with your equine, beware that the prize never becomes more important than the animal. The proper perspective for competition is that you desire to improve each time you participate, and yet realize that at any given event either you or your animal are subject to having an off day. Just as we are subject to days in which we do not perform our best, so are our animals. Such days require patience and understanding on the part of a good horseman. The display of patience and understanding on these occasions will only enhance the trust that your equine has placed in you. Also, do not be too quick to place the blame on your animal as you are probably experiencing your own inadequacy and are projecting it to your equine.

It’s important that you realize that each time you are around your equine or riding him, you are to one degree or another always training. Build on your confidence. You control the situation, so build positive experiences out of all circumstances. View all obstacles, elements, and objects around you as an opportunity to enhance the relationship with your equine, including the unexpected. You need to be the leader. You need to be the one in control, but also learn in time to commit yourself to the care of your equine as they are worthy of such commitment. Most of all, always prove yourself to be worthy of the trust your equine places in you.

In conclusion, realize that the knowledge shared here comes from a life of experiences with equine and through a dedication to learn from them. Nothing we have discussed comes easily, nor does the establishment of a proper relationship. It is our hope that you have gained insight into the possibility of achieving more rewarding experiences with your animals, just as we have with our own. If you doubt that your equine has the ability to relate to you as described in this article then it will not happen. Your relationships will never become more than you believe they can. In all relationships, you must be willing to give if you want to receive. If you want your equine to understand you, you must strive to understand them first. If you want to be heard, you must listen.

Project confidence, and you will be confided in. If you wish to be respected, show respect. Learn to trust if you want to be trusted. These are the principles that will allow you to build a proper relationship with your equine. We hope that through this series of articles we have helped you and your equine to enjoy a good life together and succeed with your dreams.

Another easy way of ensuring that you never gain the respect of your equine is to only give negative feedback, never positive. Many equestrian enthusiasts do this without thinking about it. Soon your animal is convinced that a correct response is not noteworthy, but a mistake will be dealt with swiftly and harshly. If you could put yourself in their hooves, you would understand how it feels to only receive negative feedback. This treatment results in an animal that has no self esteem, feels defeated and therefore is incapable of respecting another. On the other hand, if we teach our equine to have self respect by showing it to them, they will also learn to respect us.

Confidence must precede respect. Positive experiences and positive feedback instill confidence. According to some psychologists that train leadership development programs, people need at least four positive feedbacks to one negative in order to perform at their best on the job and be open to new experiences. Change is also very hard for equine as well as people to accept. Through building positive self image and confidence in our equine, they are more readily able to accept changes to their circumstances and/or environment. These changes are inevitable throughout their lives. The chances that they will always belong to the same person or live in the same location all of their life are remote. Our equine face the same challenges that we do. Don’t sell them short when it comes to understanding how they respond to these challenges.

Affection also must precede respect. Equine may respond positively to someone out of fear or out of a need that person can fill, but this is not respect, this is short lived need. Equine can not dislike a person and at the same time have respect for them. However, if we have understanding, open communication, and confidence in another, it is only natural that this will lead to affection and respect. If you wish to gain the respect of your animal, learn to understand them, listen to them, and never demand more than they are capable of giving. It is your job to know what their capabilities are through patience and observance. When you do require something from your equine, patiently see it through until you are satisfied that he has at least attempted to comply, then reward the attempt. Perfection can always be attained through repetition and steady improvement. If your equine is prone to stubbornness, respect must be gained through patience and persistence. If you find that you are becoming frustrated in the process, realize that properly trained stubbornness will become a determining factor leading to success in whatever you attempt with your animal. Always finish each session on a positive note with something your equine can easily achieve. Let the session end before you or your animal’s frustration takes over. Allowing frustration to escalate will only set your animal’s progress back and diminish respect.

Incorrect responses should be counteracted with redirection. For example, if you are teaching your animal to side pass, start by applying the proper pressure and cues. Most likely, your equine’s first response will be to back up. Push him forward immediately, and ask again patiently. Counteract each wrong response and keep asking until an attempt is achieved, such as crossing over with either set of legs. Praise the horse, and then do something else that you both are proficient at. Improve on your accomplishment at a later time or on the next session.

Negative feedback should only be used when you are certain that your equine comprehends your request, has no apprehension, and is obviously refusing out of a desire to do something different or because he does not wish to comply even though he is comfortable and capable. Be careful! Do not be too quick to judge your animal’s response as defiant. A good session with your equine contains more positive than negative feedback and always ends with a sense of accomplishment. Sessions such as these will develop mutual respect for both equine and owner.

To summarize, if you want to gain the respect of your equine, you must first show respect for them. To show respect, you must demonstrate that you have a desire to understand them, be open to two way communication, and display confidence in yourself and your animal to achieve certain goals. You must ask only what your equine is capable of giving. You must patiently and persistently work with your animal until an attempt at compliance is achieved, then provide positive feedback. Praise, patience and persistence are keys to your success.

A more practical approach would be to understand that the probability of the worst happening is not very realistic. We can then set aside the negative thoughts and fears, focus on a positive outcome and mentally create a plan to minimize the danger. In this way we can project confidence in our self and to the animal we are working with and create a positive experience. If on the other hand we choose to dwell on our fear, we will most likely create an even worse situation.

Building confidence in both people and equine can be achieved by setting up challenging obstacles and situations in practice before we are confronted by the same situation in reality. We can build positive experiences for us and our equine by working through these practice situations, achieving success and conquering our fears. Start with things that create a small amount of difficulty or fear, such as walking up to a piece of plastic or an open umbrella. These types of exercises can be achieved either with the person having the horse in hand or with them in the saddle, depending on the person and the horse’s abilities. Other exercises can include crossing water, backing over logs, taking a slicker from a tree or post, having the equine stand on plastic or plywood, etc. If the person starts by going through the exercises on the ground, they should eventually progress to the point of accomplishing these difficult tasks under saddle.

The key is to work at a pace which allows the person and the horse the opportunity to be successful in handling these stressful situations together, thereby building self-esteem and confidence in each other. For this type of exercise to be successful, two way communication between the person and the animal must be developed. It is up to the person, however, to develop leadership skills and to project confidence to the equine. As the team of man and equine learns to face fears together and to interact positively in difficult situations, both will gain confidence and will eventually be able to face any situation together. If a person or an animal chooses to get through life by avoiding all that causes fear or stress, there is a likelihood that at some point in time avoidance of danger will be impossible, and tragedy will occur. The fact that they will not be able to act rationally upon realizing their inability to escape will lead to disaster.

It is much wiser to take small steps today toward facing our fears in order to learn how to project confidence in stressful situations. In developing exercises to build confidence, we must never be foolish and place ourselves or our animal in needless danger because of a lack of careful thought and planning. The purpose is to patiently build positive experiences in difficult situations. Recklessness will lead to negative experiences and will undermine the development of confidence.